Sunday, March 2, 2014

Explore how amazing you are!!

I was feeling a little down the other day & decided to write a list of things I had done in my lifetime. I tend to think I haven’t done anything yet or that what I’m doing is just tiny. I must say it made me feel better to think about it and to write it down.

Things I’ve done (in no particular order):
1. Lived in a tent for a summer at a camp ground while teaching Bible Camp & doing beach maintenance. Also, won the lumberjack contest on the Civic Holiday weekend.
2. Spent a summer with in Scotland & England. While in Scotland taught vacation Bible school. Also lived on a canal boat travelling through England doing puppet shows and singing wherever there was an audience.
3. Spent a summer with at an orphanage in Israel building retaining walls & gardening.
4. Survived boot camp in the jungle in Florida for the above 2 mission projects with Teen Missions.
5. Spent 2 weeks on Germany preaching in the streets.
6. Went to Bible College. Preached from the pulpit at several churches, laid hands on sick people.
7. Encourage others (I am usually the spiritual go to girl)
8. Graduated grade 13. In Canada we used to have 5 years of high school.
9. Owned & drove a motorcycle. It’s on the top ten list of fun.
10. Climbed up 10 water falls in the Dominican Republic. Slid down the water falls and jumped the last one that was 20 feet high. On the top ten list of fun.
11. Drove a transport truck. (didn’t get my license, don’t care, I had the guts to try)
12. Studied to be an Executive Administrative Assistant (can’t type worth crap graduated as a receptionist)
13. Worked as an Executive Administrative Assistant to the president and credit manager at the head office of a nationwide company.
14. Bold enough to leave 2 common law marriages, 2 marriages and at least one job when they weren’t beneficial to me & I couldn’t change them for the better.
15. Manage a 2.5 million dollar property virtually by myself. I am the responsible party 24/7/365 period. Hire contractors, collect rent, rent apts, fix things, garden, etc etc etc, pick up dog poop
16. Care for the seniors at this property (get discounts on utilities, eyeglasses, hearing aids. Help them find the food bank for the day. Give them food and money for laundry. Pray with them. Help them get to the hospital when they are too mentally ill to live well with others.)
17. I used to walk with a cane. I was in pain from my neck down to my ankles. When the medical system couldn’t help me, I immersed myself in chiropractic, massage therapy & naturopathic therapy to heal myself. Since then I have :
a. Completed a marathon.
b. Completed a couple of duathlons and a couple of sprint triathlons.
c. Done a slew of half marathons, most of them in crazy locations in the middle of the night.
d. Completed a mud run.

I encourage you to write down what you have done in your lifetime, it might just surprise you & encourage you.

Sunday, February 23, 2014

Rock bottom Lonely

I’ve been at my rock bottom lately. I’m so lonely I can’t stand it. I left my husband a couple of months ago and I didn’t remember that lonely could be so painful. It drags me away from my desk, it sucks the pleasure out of my sports, and it interrupts me in the middle of conversations and takes me to my bed where I could cry for days. I know it is time to get past it. I’m determined to make progress this weekend.

I’m tempted to be mad at girlfriends because they should spend more time with me. If I only had more conversations, hugs and kisses I would be ok. But I know better than that. This happiness I am searching for must be inside me. No external relationship is going to fix this for real.

I remember back to my first marriage where I was extremely lonely. I cried hysterically and my husband who didn’t know what to do with me bought me music cd’s and flowers. I was drunk a lot just to be numb enough to not feel the pain. I did other really stupid things trying to ease my pain and eventually I left that relationship.

I went to live with a girlfriend which was comforting and I picked up a boyfriend quite quickly and wasn’t lonely any more. But unfortunately I missed an opportunity to learn about lonely and what makes me truly happy.

So I’m back to being lonely again and this time I’m going to learn. The biggest thing I have discovered in my recent reading is that the only thing one really needs to correct in their thoughts is that one is separated from God. Once one understands that God has your back there really is no reason to fear anything. God is love, all love, period.

Quoting from A Course in Miracles “Perfect love casts out fear, if fear exists, then there is not perfect love.
Only perfect love exists. If there is fear, it produces a state that does not exist.
Believe this and you will be free. Only God can establish this solution, and this faith is his gift.”

I’ve been seeking security lately; I’ve been trying to predict the future. Actually I’ve been trying to plot the future, if I do ‘x’ will ‘y’ happen? And it’s just driving me crazy. I’m realizing the real security in life is in trusting that God is taking care of me.

“If God be for you who can be against you? Shackles may be off of the feet but they are still wrapped around some minds” – Gabby Douglas gold medal winner 2012 Summer Olympics
I think that kind of explains where I’m at now. I know in my heart God is good, I’ve seen lots of miracles in my lifetime but my brain is currently wrapped up in my fear and loneliness.

I am constantly reading, studying, watching videos, writing in my journal and praying. I feel like I am on a better track now than I was a few days ago. I have the knowledge I need to work through this and I will.

Monday, February 17, 2014

Fundraising Anyone??

Are you in the Santa Cruz, California area.
Does your school, church, sports team, or neighborhood need to raise money for a community goal? AVON has a solution. Collect orders for products from our fundraising brochures and I will give you up to 30 percent of the sales for your cause. This opportunity is open to everyone non-profit or not. Any group of people who want to raise money for any purpose can host a fundraiser. Your neighbor’s house burned down (want to help?), your church needs new choir gowns?, need equipment for your soccer team?? You get the idea, any group of people for any purpose.

Email me for details at

Let’s get started!!

Friday, March 8, 2013

0 to 10k

A couple of weeks ago when I was at the NLP seminar someone asked me what I had passion for.

The first two things I put on the list were I love running in the mountains & I love walking in the desert. I know within those two phrases there are really paragraphs of information.

I love trail running in California. I love walking in the desert, my favorite race is along highway 375 near area 51 at midnight under a full moon. You will note that I did not say I like walking on asphalt in California. And yet I told my girlfriend I would be doing the full marathon at Avenue of the Giants this year. Last year Avenue of the Giants half marathon was one of those races when I was constantly wondering why I was out there and I told myself I was either going to do the 10k to win or the full marathon next year. Obviously I was looking for a bigger challenge.

My marathon training isn't going that well as it consists of walking two miles, buying something to eat, walking two miles buying something else to eat etc. I'm getting the miles in but not in a race friendly way. I don't think there is ice cream, potato salad & breakfast burritos on the race course.

How much would it knock my socks off to win a race? That's a good question. I've never really thought about winning before. I usually come pretty close to last or somewhere in the tail end. But it got me excited to think about winning and I tore out the door running two days in a row as far and as fast as I could go. Damn my shins hurt and I need to be aware of that IT band thing or I'm going to be sidelined again.
Time to regroup. Two sports bras feels better than just one (weird but it works). New Saucony's in blow your mind neon (OMG they just look fast).

How far to run, how often to run, how fast to run?? Who knows these things, I don't. Can I win the 10K at Avenue? – they are pretty darn fast there and it is two months away. I don't really know. Can I win a 10k somewhere this season,? YES I CAN.

Friday, February 22, 2013

My introduction to NLP

I first discovered NLP in January 2012. I picked up a book at the library titled Law of Attraction. I had been studying The Secret for several years and this was the natural next step.
This book was so simply written I couldn’t believe I was reading it. It is written simply so anyone can comprehend it which is wonderful because it has a very powerful message.
This book taught me to identify what I didn’t want in my life and use that to identify what I did want in my life. From there to create positive sentences, or affirmations to confess during the day. These affirmations had to be believable to me. They had to be sentences I could say without blockage. If I couldn’t say them confidently then I needed to either change up the sentence so that I could say it or to analyze my belief and figure out why I couldn’t say it (and make adjustments based on that).
I love affirmations, as I have watched a lot of things shift for the better in the last year. I highly recommend this book as an introduction to NLP.